Emotional Intelligence, Daily. Start now: https://www.theschooloflife.com/subscription/ Why do highly capable people become powerless in intimate relationships? This film explores the paradox of individuals who are shrewd in public but unable to protect themselves in love. We trace this pattern to a childhood survival mechanism, where unwarranted innocence was necessary to cope with uncaring caregivers, preventing them from seeing or defending against private danger. #Psychology #SelfProtection #Relationships #TraumaHealing #EmotionalSafety Unlock all the content of The School of Life with a subscription to our podcast, articles, videos, and exercises, specially tailored to your needs. Get weekly insights for better relationships, deeper self-knowledge, and inner calm straight to your inbox. Sign up for more ideas, plus 10% off your first shop order: https://www.theschooloflife.com/signup/ You can read more on this and other subjects in our articles, here: https://www.theschooloflife.com/article/why-we-become-unable-to-protect-ourselves/ “There are people who, in most walks of life, are extremely canny and highly able to look after themselves. They may be shrewd in business, undaunted in social encounters, and vociferous in defending their causes in public. And yet, in other situations, these very same people can find themselves sharply and strangely unable to protect their own interests. This is one of the more subtle effects of childhood trauma in adulthood. The situations in which these people become powerless, innocent, unworldly and too pure for their own good are intimate ones. In close relationships, the years seem to fall away from them. They find themselves in a couple and lose any ability to imagine that their partner might be anything other than ‘very nice’ and ‘on their side’. Other people may spot a problem at once; in their eyes, all is completely well until it is far, far too late…” OUR COLLECTIONS https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28XmpcEwc0qydf2jSszQFSht81E https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28XmpckOvZZ_AZjD7WM2p9-6NBv https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28XmpeUL1vz9Su7OmeghBDgmj7X https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28XmpeypJMHfNbJ4RAFkRtmAN3P https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28XmpcpxBm1RoGRx4mVKNRIrKkG https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28Xmpcp7jXVszdNruKUtHZ2zuZb https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28Xmpfv2COuuJaKzy6E2n8nSMdi https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwxNMb28Xmpc1qCJ6RYYh4rKNOOlKtFIK SOCIAL MEDIA Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-school-of-life/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theschooloflife?lang=en CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Natalia Talkowska https://www.natalkadesign.com/ Title animation produced in collaboration with Graeme Probert www.gpmotion.co.uk